6 ways to bounce back after a relationship meltdown

6 ways to bounce back after a relationship meltdown6 ways to bounce back after a relationship meltdownRelationship meltdowns happen to the best of us (and theyve certainly happened to me).As humans its only natural that we make mistakes, have freak-outs, and overreact sometimes. Lots of things can cause us to have a meltdown, from fear of abandonment to jealousy issues. We cant control the past, and once we freak out, whats done is done. Luckily, wecancontrol how we act after we have a meltdown, and thats whats going to make all the difference.Here are 6 steps for bouncing back after having arelationshipmeltdown.Step 1 Stay CalmIts not easy to stay calm when emotions are running wild, but its important to be chill when trying to repair a relationship after an emotion-fueled meltdown.Before you try talking to your partner to make amends or clear things up, you want to be in a relaxed state of mind. This way you cancommunicate effectivelyandnothave another freak out. Do whatever you go tta do to blow off some steam and de-stress, whether its heading to a kickboxing class, journaling, or taking a bath. Youll be ready to talk - and more importantly, listen - without yelling or giving an attitude to your partner.Step 2 Recognize what the real issue at hand isLook back at your meltdown and try to better understand it. What caused it? Is there something deeper than surface level that was a contributing factor?For example, if you had ajealous freak-outafter you saw your boyfriend like another girls Instagram picture, ask yourself what the real issue is. Are you really just mad that hes looking at other girls profiles, or are your feelings hurt because you feel like he doesnt value you or give you attention the way he used to?In situations like this, its usually the latter. This is the issue that you need to address.Step 3 Recognize what the issue looks like to your partnerYou know what Im about to sayput yourself in your partners shoesIf the situation was reversed, ho w would you feel? Hurt? Betrayed? Mistrusted? Lied to? You arent a mind reader, so youll have to communicate with your partner and ask how they feel. Clear, open communication will allow you to truly understand your partners emotions and stance on the situation. From there, you can figure out how tobounce backand make it better.Another tip try not to get defensive. It doesnt help and nobody wants to deal with thatStep 4 Leave your ich at the doorTrust me, I know its hard to let go of your ego for a minute and apologize, especially if you think you arentreallyin the wrong. Take a step back to evaluate your actions and how they put a strain on your relationship.Many of us love to play the blame game, but its crucial that youre able to take the blame and hold yourself accountable when necessary. Be able tomean itwhen you say, I know I messed up, and Im sorry. Your partner will know if your apology is sincere or not.You might even need to apologize to yourself Be kind and understanding so you can heal and not beat yourself up for making mistakes.Step 5 Figure out an action planWhat are you going to do to make the situation okay? How are you going to mend the relationship, regain trust, and so on? Sure,make-up sexis great, but its not going to fix all your problems.While its tempting to brush things under the rug and just move on, its all going to build up and possibly result in another meltdown if you dont address the underlying issues. So again, communicate, communicate, communicate Work through the awkwardness, talk to your partner, and figure out whats next for the both of you.On top of that, figure out how you can betteryourselfand how you can be a better partner. herausforderung solving isnt easy, but its essential in any type of relationship, and itll pay off.Step 6 Remember that no relationship is perfect.No matter how perfect someones life may look from the outside - in public orsocial media- you never really know how someone elses relationship is progre ssing. You should know by now Social media is just an illusion Plus, its damaging to compare yourself to others, and the same rules apply for comparing your relationship to others relationships.Instead, focus on yourself and your partner - and what you can do to further nurture your partnership.A meltdown doesnt have to mean The EndIf youre in the process of recovering from a relationship meltdown, dont worry (remember step one Stay calm). Follow these steps and youll be well on the road to getting your relationship back to a good place. Also, consider individual orcouples therapyif things become more difficult than you both can handle. Theres no shame in seeking outside advice or counseling if it helps bring you closer to someone you love.Who knows, you might just mend your relationship so well that you and your partner will be even better off than you were beforeThis article first appeared on Talkspace.